First memory

I  recently read this book and the author writes his first memory.  To me it seems like a very young age (around 18 months) to be remembering a moment in his childhood.  It freaks me out a bit that he remembered his childhood at that young of age.

My first memory is being at Disney World, I was 3.  I remember being on the Dumbo ride, vaguely the hotel room, the ride "Its a Small World After All" and that is about it.

This makes me wonder what Leland's first memory will be when he gets older.  Will it be something we did this week or last week or tomorrow?  Maybe he will remember his bison obsession and how we visit the Museum once a week on his request.  Or will he remember watching DVDs on the computer?  As if parenting wasn't stressful enough already, now I have to worry what his first memory will be and hopefully it will be a happy one.

Maybe I am just being crazy.

What is your first memory?

Mine

Leland has a new word and it is his favorite word- MINE.
He uses it all the time.

And it is annoying.

I know it is a phase and most kids go through it, but I thought it was a phase that happened later.  I am wondering if watching a baby has caused this phase to happen sooner rather than later.  I don't know.

It is a bit sad because at playgroup Leland goes around saying it over and over and all the other kids don't really get it yet.  They look at him and he says it.  They take a step toward him and he says it.

How do I fix this?  Or move past this phase?  Any advice?

Because it is really annoying.

Live in the present

My new motto that I am going to try my best to live by is live in the present.

Life is short, people die, bad things happen.  I learned about a friend's death this week.  It was very unexpected and tragic.  It is a reminder of anything can happen especially the unexpected.  

You can't live in the past or dream of the future because then you miss the present.

I would miss how Leland changes every day.  How wonderful he can be.  I miss the random moments I find him quietly reading books or playing with his animal figurines.  The sound of him waking of from a nap and running out to the living room.

All these moments would be lost and forgotten if I was reliving the past or dreaming of the toddler years being over.

I don't know what will happen tomorrow.  I want to know I lived life.  I enjoyed it and relished in the small moments.  

Live in the present.  

Introvert

There is no doubt that I am an introvert.  I am a homebody.  
Leland has made me go against this a bit because he likes to be out of the house.  If we stay home for too long in the morning he becomes unbearable.  Until we finally leave the house and he is automatically happier and better behaved.

Along the same lines I go in and out of social phases.  Times when I feel like doing things and making plans.  But then there are times that when being social feels very challenging and energy consuming.

I am in one of those phases right now.  The thought of having to talk to people and meet up with them sounds very draining.  It doesn't help that a couple of people I thought were friends I have decided I in fact do not care for them.

I am usually pretty good at reading people when I first meet them and getting a feel for how they are and how we will click.  This one person I knew I didn't like from the start but for some reason we kept hanging out.  Recently this person has said things that made me officially decide I don't care for them, but now I feel stuck.  Ugh. 

Today Leland is sick and I am actually a tad grateful for it.  It means I can sit in this quiet house while he sleeps most of the day.  He also has been extra cuddly and took a morning nap on me.  I think this means he is going to be a good sick person.  Totally lucked out on that one, I am not so sweet when sick.