tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75420426193191760962023-11-16T04:10:41.575-07:00Megan's DigestRamblings of a Stay at Home MommaAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.comBlogger537125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-65259361288346124122013-04-30T14:29:00.003-06:002013-04-30T14:29:50.907-06:00Word PressSwitching to Word Press and a new domain (again I know). <br />
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New domain is <a href="http://megsdigest.com/">megsdigest.com</a>. It is a work in progress though, so bear with me. <br />
<br />
New bloglovin page, <a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/7172013/?claim=v9sp6rxsqqk">Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-9910480161747865632013-04-22T14:07:00.001-06:002013-04-22T14:07:42.103-06:00Birthday Photos Leland had a wonderful 2nd birthday. He got to see all his friends, play, eat chocolate and hot dogs, and read a new Elmo book, what more could he ask for?<br />
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Birthday Ballons</div>
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"Helping" in the kitchen</div>
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Kid's table at the party, the only photo from the party</div>
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Birthday bison</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqTq1fOt01Qn2z3fNn_V7kyv2cmGOq3O7swwRrblYaprUdOAC2Vj3qpLDNjTjIooNUxgE8pYGkwtr3Nbj1jXM-kKM88uwcuLdR2yMMOa60cnfntvU_gum66daNeVBQXlpg50hNEtQs0N0/s1600/DSC_1179.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqTq1fOt01Qn2z3fNn_V7kyv2cmGOq3O7swwRrblYaprUdOAC2Vj3qpLDNjTjIooNUxgE8pYGkwtr3Nbj1jXM-kKM88uwcuLdR2yMMOa60cnfntvU_gum66daNeVBQXlpg50hNEtQs0N0/s400/DSC_1179.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Packaging and wrapping are always better than the actual gift. </div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">P.S. Did anyone send Leland a wooden name puzzle? No idea who this was sent from...</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-12023217635556533732013-04-21T15:58:00.001-06:002013-04-21T15:58:15.438-06:00An interview with a 2 year oldA birthday interview with Leland. Someone turned two on Friday, so I decided to capture some of the cuteness. <br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">It is a bit long (almost 4 minutes) but I did cut out a lot.</span><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/RZV0v2WeDSA" width="560"></iframe><br />
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His default answer is bison if you didn't pick that up. I am hoping to make this a yearly tradition. <br />
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Happy Birthday Leland. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-68128504231874064732013-04-15T14:34:00.000-06:002013-04-15T14:35:48.895-06:00My issue with the park<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKRbjPuvBuAOFc8QmF6oIwsQfE8M9h7HzvONv2etQ6xdLhsIE8BWOV3QrdL7nLfHS80AMgxRx57A3rYLi-90LtRmYfr3RVFIN73waYEvKk2mcmyHBpAKICCxjPf0l_J4mT55lMeLBBssg/s1600/DSC_1125.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKRbjPuvBuAOFc8QmF6oIwsQfE8M9h7HzvONv2etQ6xdLhsIE8BWOV3QrdL7nLfHS80AMgxRx57A3rYLi-90LtRmYfr3RVFIN73waYEvKk2mcmyHBpAKICCxjPf0l_J4mT55lMeLBBssg/s400/DSC_1125.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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The park and I have a love/hate relationship in my opinion.<br />
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It is great that Leland gets to be outside and I get a moment break of constantly entertaining him.<br />
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<i><b>But</b></i> there is sand involved and I really dislike sand. Two things I dislike most about nature are sand and wind, which is why I don't care for the beach.<br />
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Back to the point, my real issue with the park are the parents. I don't hover over Leland at the park. If I am alone I read my book or if not I talk to a friend. <br />
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But every time I am at the park there are other moms that are constantly trying to figure out who Leland belongs to. I know this because they say things out loud asking "Who's kid is this?", "Where is your mommy?", looking around for his parent when he runs past them, and I am just sitting on the bench enjoying myself staring them straight in the face. <br />
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I get it, they are just trying to make sure he has an adult with him, but they are so obnoxious about it. Oh helicopter moms, you kill me. <br />
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<a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/samantha-kempjackson/types-of-moms_b_3032999.html?utm_hp_ref=parents&ir=Parents" target="_blank">This recent Huff Post article describes 10 parents you will meet at the park.</a> Helicopter mom is on the top of the list, another one I avoid is Superior mom and Competitive mom. I am really bad about talking to parents at the park, because I don't want to find them anymore annoying that I already do. <br />
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So I keep to my book and keep an eye on Leland. <br />
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Anyone else have an issue with the park?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-25205495191437875362013-04-10T13:49:00.001-06:002013-04-10T13:49:59.624-06:00Bike Riding and other memories<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSPw0s5corI7ChQGIcN7t1ZjavbeQAEtKFcGf3i_iGIaQd0pWYu6Y3n4qfVALQhxvFtZsjqZlIYOXVCWVPEzEuEeraKskU_d54UmDOTXQibfnB7hyphenhyphenMYacC-1MC1IIZjqsTH7K0ZsvwGpw/s1600/DSC_1122.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSPw0s5corI7ChQGIcN7t1ZjavbeQAEtKFcGf3i_iGIaQd0pWYu6Y3n4qfVALQhxvFtZsjqZlIYOXVCWVPEzEuEeraKskU_d54UmDOTXQibfnB7hyphenhyphenMYacC-1MC1IIZjqsTH7K0ZsvwGpw/s400/DSC_1122.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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I love doing something that reminds me of old times.<br />
For example, I have a very fond memory of riding my bike during college on summer nights. The air is cool and feels great after a hot day, I have most likely had a couple of drinks but I am just happy. The wind hitting my face and the strain in my legs is one of the best feelings. <br />
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When the weather is right and I am on my bike, I remember those times and it makes me smile. When it is a around 60 degrees and the sun is setting while I am riding my bike, my brain feels pure bliss. <br />
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There is are other memories that often come to my mind. <br />
- Walking in cow field behind my house, and crossing or wading in the creek. <br />
- Laying in the back of my dad's pickup on a cool summer night searching for a spot to watch the stars<br />
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I often think that the reason these particular memories stick with me, is they helped make me the person I am today. A person that loves the environment and being outside. I think these moments were the start of my environmentalism, I just didn't know it until I went to college and decided to join the environmental club. <br />
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I hope that I can provide the right environment for Leland to have fond memories of his childhood as well. Memories that will make him realize what life is about or help him define himself later on. I think we are already on the right path with limited screen time and being outside when the weather is nice. But I guess we won't know until another 20 years. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-59160616661259869462013-04-09T13:40:00.002-06:002013-04-09T13:40:27.538-06:00Kitchen MusingsI love cooking. I have really been getting into lately and it is really nice. It has become a routine that after nap time when Jeff is home he occupies Leland and I make dinner and enjoy a glass of wine. It is really a place where I can think and clear my head and just be. <br />
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Some photos from recent kitchen adventures. <br />
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Buttermilk biscuits</div>
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Pizza with pesto, roasted broccoli, goat cheese and romano cheese</div>
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What hides in the oven when it is not in use</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-18213546430309698712013-04-08T13:02:00.000-06:002013-04-08T13:02:54.414-06:00The Meaning of Time<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://dontmesswithtaxes.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/11/04/dali_clocks_2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="288" src="http://dontmesswithtaxes.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/11/04/dali_clocks_2.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://dontmesswithtaxes.typepad.com/dont_mess_with_taxes/2007/11/tax-carnival-24.html" target="_blank">{Image Source}</a></span></div>
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Time has changed since becoming a parent. I have a hard time understanding time in the constraints we put on it. A year, a month, a week, a day. It almost has no meaning. I feel like 2013 just started, it probably doesn't help that January and February seem to have been misplaced in my brain. I was having a conversation with someone yesterday and they said something about September and how long ago it was, I was very confused by this thinking that it was currently January. Meaning September was only three months ago instead of seven. Only several minutes later I realized it is April, whoa.<br />
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Thinking about this time last year (April 2012), it seems lifetimes ago. At that point Leland wasn't quite walking or talking and I was still in grad school.<br />
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<i>I can't even comprehend that last sentence. </i><br />
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But thinking about my time in grad school itself is logical or placing time in Leland's developments is comprehendible. The time Leland was a newborn or crawling or walking or talking. That is much better for my momma brain. But those stages of time seem very spread out and not following each other sequentially.<br />
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Is this just me? Or do other people/parents have a hard time understand time with children? <br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-69323220595841903672013-04-05T17:55:00.000-06:002013-04-05T17:55:00.695-06:00Weekly Updates<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>Things that happened this week that don't deserve their own post and are too long to tweet:</i></span><br />
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1. Leland constantly wants to listen to music. As soon as we wake up he goes to the computer and requests music and it isn't just any music, he wants the Sesame Street channel on Pandora. Needless to say we have compromises on how long we listen to that channel before switching it to another. Or else I may start pulling my hair out. <br />
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2. Leland now thinks it is hilarious to tell me "no, no" when I ask for a kiss or hug. For other people, he will give them willingly, he will also tell other people he loves them. Maybe he is around me too often or maybe the attitude just beginning (isn't it still to early for that?). <br />
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3. I am planning on <a href="http://2ndgreenrevolution.com/2013/03/22/summer-challenge/" target="_blank">avoiding the car for a week in June</a>, so I am trying to bike more this week and the next few weeks to get in shape. In other news, I am really sore. <br />
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4. We are slowly working on getting our garden ready for seeding. Thankfully we did a lot of work last fall so we have minimal work this spring. In other news, I am really sore.<br />
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5. Leland now knows and understands the word wine. So whenever I get myself a glass of wine he has to point it out and shout wine. Proud parent right here. <br />
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Have a wonderful weekend. We plan to go on a hike, visit a liquor outlet store and I personally plan to have some alone time. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-27521088104847576032013-04-04T13:19:00.000-06:002013-04-04T13:19:00.425-06:00Snack Attack<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Leland has taken over the cat scratching post as his snack area. Sesame Street characters often take over the space too. He also likes to have multiple bowls for his snacks so they can be divided out before being eaten. He must be like a cat- likes to play with his food before eating. </div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-21578309162927925202013-04-03T14:12:00.001-06:002013-04-03T14:12:51.043-06:00Motherhood<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I was never one of those people that always wanted to be a mother. I never had dreams about it when I was younger. In college there were times that I didn't think I would want children. I had an aunt and uncle that never had kids and sometimes that life seemed like a good idea. Needless to say I was still very self involved at the time, but I was 21. The same aunt told me about a conversation we had when I was still in elementary school. I asked her if she was going to have kids someday, and she said no. The conversation turned and somehow I was telling her how I was not going to have kids. So again, it was never a life long dream of mine as a child. <br />
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Then it turned into more of maybe I will have kids some day, we will see. Jeff seemed okay going either way, which was nice, no pressure. My only stipulation that if we do have kids I wanted to be done by the age of 30. But then some time after we moved to Denver I got the urge. I wanted to have a kid. It was all I could think about. So away went the birth control and a couple months later we learned I was pregnant.<br />
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Now, I couldn't imagine it any other way. It just feels right to be Leland's mom. I feel like it was suppose to be my job all along I just didn't know. I can't imagine going back to a regular job now because I feel this is where I am suppose to be, at home with Leland (especially while he is young). I also know that our family isn't complete and I am not for sure when it will be, but hopefully in the (near) future we can expand the brood. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-84651953905643899582013-04-02T13:11:00.000-06:002013-04-02T13:11:50.330-06:00Bedtime Stylin'Leland is a bit obsessed with his snow boots lately, or really all shoes. He loves shoes that he can put on by himself, like his snow boots, my shoes, Jeff's shoes, etc. Here are some photos of him showing off his skills. <br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-21729530198043973792013-04-01T13:20:00.000-06:002013-04-01T13:20:25.177-06:00Bubbles!Leland is a bubble loving boy. He has loved bath time bubbles for awhile now and asks for them every time he takes a bath or a shower. He has now discovered outdoor bubbles. It always surprises him when he blows and bubbles appear. They are a big hit and a great after dinner activity. <br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-37251886550110172212013-03-29T08:30:00.000-06:002013-03-29T08:30:01.403-06:00Hikes<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
There is a little nature area right next to Stapleton that we went to a couple of weeks ago. It has a nice little lake that wasn't much of a lake and a one mile loop around said lake. Leland walked 3/4 of a mile that day, I was quite impressed. There were many stops of course, it took nearly 2 hours but he did it. It makes me get excited about going on hikes with him this year. I went and got him some hiking boots so he has some good ankle support. As long as the weather cooperates and the cold weather eventually stops, we can get our nature on. </div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-10307368398331895612013-03-28T14:12:00.000-06:002013-03-28T14:12:51.440-06:00It takes a village<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="http://cps.regis.edu/blog/it-takes-a-village-influencing-the-future-of-our-teachers/" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: x-small;">{source}</span></a></div>
<i>It takes a village</i>...<br />
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For everyone this takes on a different meaning. For some it means to be close to grandparents and family members, for me it means to make my own family with friends. I feel that I am really starting to have my village. I was already feeling this way but after the miscarriage I knew it was true. That I had people there to support me and love me and love Leland. People that would watch him during last minute emergencies and I would do the same for them. <br />
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I have never been one to have a lot of girlfriends. I have always had girls as friends, but often my close friends were guys. This has changed for the most part since becoming a mother and joining a playgroup. While guys can come to the playgroup they don't. And some of my venting is about things only women can understand, like breastfeeding. So now I am in a stage of my life where most of my closest friends are women and while it is different it is really good.<br />
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I really enjoy those friendships and glad I have found my village. <br />
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Jeff will most likely go elsewhere for his PhD, and it will be very sad to move away from the people I love in Denver. I will be glad to move to a different town, because I am tired of Denver itself. But not the people, I will miss the people. <br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-31592314831524312872013-03-27T13:41:00.000-06:002013-03-27T13:41:05.007-06:00Pack N Climb<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/2X9Ub12eJ4M" width="560"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-18221318665001221972013-03-26T14:29:00.000-06:002013-03-26T14:29:06.299-06:00Daddy funLeland really enjoys his daddy being around on the weekends. Especially because Jeff is willing to do some things I am not. Like wear a bison hat and run around on all fours chasing Leland. Leland loved it. It really wore Jeff out, I was tired from just watching (thru the lens of course). Leland also had to take his turn of charging and chasing Daddy.<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-6449275096077338062013-03-25T08:00:00.000-06:002013-03-25T08:00:06.203-06:00Our Connections<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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It seems that technology keeps improving to make us more connected. First there were land lines, then answering machines, then pagers, then home computers, then cell phones, then laptops, then texting, then Facebook, then Twitter, then smartphones, then iPads. Each level makes us easier and quicker to reach.<br />
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Is this a good thing? I feel the more we are connected through technology the less we are connected in life. <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/24/opinion/sunday/your-phone-vs-your-heart.html?_r=0" target="_blank">This article proves this point</a>. <br />
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I wonder if being less accessible when only land lines or hand written letters were available made for better relationships. That we each had down time, time for our brains to clear, time for our bodies to relax. When a friend dropped by the house or called it was great. You wanted that connection because it hadn't been happening all day. Again read the article linked above it proves that this is true, we need to be unplugged from everything every once in awhile for better relationships. <br />
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Now with current technologies there are less opportunities for relaxation and constant opportunity for being tuned it. Not only are there phones to keep us connected to the world, there are TVs with 24 hour news. I wonder if this makes us more irritable with people in real life. When we never get a break from a spouse, child, news, etc. are brains are frazzled. We can now vent about those aspects of life on Facebook, Twitter, and blogs. What if we didn't have those outlets? Would we just calm down in the bathroom ( the only room with a closing door in our house), read a book outside, go on a walk. <br />
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I tend to think being less connected would make a difference, which is why I am choosing to use my phone only as a phone and not as a way to be constantly connected to social media and other outlets. <br />
I know I am not alone in this thinking since I have seen many bloggers take a month off the internet. Always describing it as awful and wonderful at the same time. Example <a href="http://www.e-tells-tales.com/2013/03/the-lost-month_5.html" target="_blank">1</a> and <a href="http://www.motleymama.com/2012/06/01/field-notes-month-without-internet-part-one/" target="_blank">2</a>.<br />
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I know I have been guilty of overusing technologies to stay constantly connected, and personally it makes me a worse parent. I am also guilty of wanting to talk to someone and expecting them to pick up their phone when I call. I shouldn't expect that and I shouldn't be constantly connected. <br />
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When I take a step back I let my kid watercolor, read to him, not let him watch a video for several days which results in him not emptying all the dvds on the floor. I capture some great moments on the camera. We go outside on walks. I read several books in a week. It is good for me. My brain feel clearer, I come up with good ideas, I can write. It is all from being less attached to technology. I also don't have to charge my phone everyday, which is crazy. There are still moments where I want to pull my hair out but they are less frequent and I can better handle them when I haven't been on my phone or the computer all day. <br />
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So maybe if you are feel in a funk or your brain is feeling clutter, take a step back and disengage from society a bit. I bet it will help. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-80307460806124936062013-03-24T13:55:00.002-06:002013-03-24T13:55:54.611-06:009 inchesI cut my hair, my long unruly hair. My hair that I can't remember when it last got cut and had to be contained for sleeping purposes. It was donated (9 inches), the first time I have had hair long enough to do that. <br />
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I am sure it will a long time before it gets cut again. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-32585652324510222582013-03-21T14:48:00.000-06:002013-03-21T14:48:11.168-06:00Weekly Update- I have transferred my blog subscriptions to Bloglovin' since it was easy, but I am still upset I have to switch from my beloved Google Reader. How dare you Google.<br />
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<a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/en/blog/4001107" title="Follow Megan's Digest on Bloglovin"><img alt="Follow on Bloglovin" border="0" src="http://www.bloglovin.com/widget/bilder/en/lank.gif?id=4001107" /></a></div>
- Leland knows his colors now, which means he has to name the color of everything. Depending on my mood it toes the line between cute and annoying.<br />
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- The<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Breakfast-Dinner-Florentine-Rancheros-Sunny-Side-Up/dp/1594746133" target="_blank"> Breakfast for Dinner</a> cookbook is amazing. I checked it out at the library and now think it is a must have. We have made two very delicious meals from it this week and I am looking forward to making more before I have to return it.<br />
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- My hair is too long. I decided to get a hair cut this weekend but I keep debating how short to actually go. I am thinking shoulder length hair and planning on taking<a href="http://beauty.about.com/od/bestcutsbyfaceshape/ss/Reese-Witherspoon-Hair-Her-Most-Iconic-Looks_5.htm" target="_blank"> this photo</a> to the salon. In related news, I am scared.<br />
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- With some birthday money I bought <a href="http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=82421&vid=1&pid=351580002" target="_blank">this dress</a> from the Gap and <a href="http://www.thewalkingcompany.com/umberto-raffini-beverly-bronze/22315" target="_blank">these shoes</a> from the Walking Company. I am very excited for warm weather to arrive so I can wear them. Hello Spring, are you there?<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-85033337180354786742013-03-18T14:11:00.003-06:002013-03-18T14:11:39.208-06:00Taking a step back<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I am taking a step back from social media. I deleted apps on my phone (Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Google reader) and even considering downgrading my phone when I can (not until August). Since I am not really using my phone as often I don't have to charge it daily, which is a big change. <br />
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I am also being better about getting on the computer during the day. I feel like I just get in a routine of being on the computer during nap time and bedtime and then just stick to it even if I have nothing that needs to be accomplished. Technology is depressing sometimes.<br />
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With my extra free time I am going through books quickly. It also means my head is clearer and I feel better about life in general.<br />
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That is all.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-26278963491800426452013-03-11T13:46:00.000-06:002013-03-11T13:46:48.313-06:00It's official...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Happy about his mango snack, with a cat photo bomb</span></div>
<br />
Leland is weaned. So after I posted that <a href="http://megsdigest.blogspot.com/2013/02/weaning.html" target="_blank">post about weaning</a>, he of course asked for milk that night. So I let him have some, but after the <a href="http://megsdigest.blogspot.com/2013/02/on-loss.html" target="_blank">miscarriage</a> and everything I couldn't do it. I just needed my body to myself. He was obviously ready with skipping days here and there. So now when he asks for it (mainly at night) I say let's cuddle instead, and he is okay with it. <br />
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It is kind of crazy not having that attachment anymore after 22 months of it plus the 9 months I was pregnant with him. But I am not upset about it, it is just weird not having that anymore. <br />
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I also went out and got two new bras, like real bras. I had not worn since I was pregnant with Leland, crazy, but oh so nice to finally wear one. My profile looks very different when there is a bra under my shirt instead of a nursing tank. Those nursing tanks are very comfortable but it would nice to have a break from them for a bit. It is kind of like wearing maternity clothes at the end of pregnancy. They are comfortable and whatnot but it gets old having to wear the same three shirts everyday, and I only had a few nursing tanks. <br />
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<i>Funny side note:</i> I have never given Leland cow's milk, since I nursed him for so long I never felt like he needed it. With his belly, I think it proves that he didn't need it nutritionally. So the other day he was been really fussy and whiny and I thought, maybe he just hasn't had enough fat/calories that day. I tried to give him a drink of milk and the look on his face was priceless. He was so grossed out and started crying with it still in his mouth, so we won't be trying that again anytime soon. <br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-48820594629945932502013-03-08T13:56:00.001-07:002013-03-08T13:56:52.519-07:00Thank you literature<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Books have been saving me lately. I am getting completely lost and absorbed in books. I don't know if the books are actually that good or I just need an outlet. I am finally okay with fiction again after a brutal trial of reading that <a href="http://megsdigest.blogspot.com/2013/01/getting-over-good-book-is-hard.html" target="_blank">one John Irving book.</a> It was so blah, boring, uninteresting- I finally had to stop reading so I didn't think badly of his writing because I really do love his books. I also had a hard time picking up another fiction book right away after trying to read it.<br />
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Here are the books I have read recently :<br />
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<i>Belong to Me</i> by Marisa de los Santos<br />
<i>The Paris Wife</i> by Paula McLain<br />
<i>A Short History of Nearly Everything</i> by Bill Bryson<br />
<i>Signs of Life: A Memoir</i> by Natalie Taylor<br />
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Some people fall to music during hard times, Jeff is like that. Music can help me (mainly Dave Matthews) but not nearly as well as books. I have never considered myself a music person and often when I am a bit down and listen to music it doesn't really help. Sometimes it just makes the situation worse, but books are different. They may be depressing at times but somehow always help me get out of the fog in the end. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-41067334147254235752013-03-05T13:55:00.000-07:002013-03-05T13:55:57.941-07:00RecoveryThis past weekend was very relaxing and restoring. My mom had already planned to be out here for a visit, so it worked out well. She arrived Thursday evening and stayed until Tuesday morning. We went to the museum (at Leland's request of course), the zoo, went to eat, etc. Leland was in a really good mood all weekend, it was nice. He was very excited about his "pappy" being here and cried when we dropped her off at the airport. This is what he is calling my mom instead of Grandma Patty. It is funny how kids make up their own names for people. Our really good friend Heather is called "Nigh" for whatever reasons. <br />
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I also read <i>Signs of Life : A Memoir</i> by Natalie Taylor. It was what I needed this weekend. The book is about Natalie's life the year after her husband dies. She was five months pregnant when her husband dies. So she goes on being a single mother and dealing with her grief. It helped me. I can be sad but I know life will continue, Leland will still need me and I will be okay. I am upset but I don't feel like a lost a child. I have a child and he is still here thankfully. To me I am just not pregnant anymore, somehow the last two months just almost didn't happen.<br />
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I am most upset about the future changing. This year at Christmas there won't be a newborn to snuggle with and pass around, it will still just be Leland, and that is okay. I just have to mentally get past that, and thankfully it was early enough that not many of these future plans were in my head. Everything was still very vague. <br />
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The thing that makes me want to cry the most is how supportive everyone is being. Thinking about what happened doesn't make me want to cry but someone asking me how I am makes me want to break down. Today for some reason I am feeling very close to crying over nothing. I think it might partially be hormones since they can stick around for 4-6 weeks. <br />
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There has also been wine. Not very much, but it is nice being able to have a glass with dinner again. That is one perk of not being pregnant. Although I would much rather be pregnant than drink that glass of wine. <br />
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Life goes on and I am doing fine.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-88062567870866557292013-02-28T13:45:00.001-07:002013-02-28T13:45:58.372-07:00On loss<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Wednesday I had my midwife appointment. I had been having some occasional spotting so I told her about it, she looked at my cervix and said it was just sensitive, nothing to worry about (which I was thinking this was the issue). She then checked for the heartbeat with a doppler and wasn't able to find anything, again nothing to worry about since it was still in the iffy stage. But she was thorough and we went in for an ultrasound. Thankfully the ultrasound tech was there and not busy. <br />
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In the ultrasound there was no heartbeat and the baby had stopped growing at 9 weeks. <br />
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I am upset of course, I wanted this baby so bad. I was in shock for a bit and then of course cried for a while. <br />
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But at the same time, I know I will get past it. It will take time but I will be in a good place soon enough. Thankfully I have Leland to lean on and love on. I can only imagine that it helps already having a child to mentally getting past this. I know I can have another child, this just wasn't the one. <br />
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Thursday morning I am going in for a D&C. Thankfully they were able to get me in sooner rather than later. I am ready to put this behind me. I was so anxious for something to wrong in this pregnancy, so much more than when I was pregnant Leland. I feel like I can relax a bit now. Even though it hurts, at least I don't need to be anxious about it anymore. <br />
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I may be quiet for a bit, but I think you will understand why. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7542042619319176096.post-88885183904269320862013-02-26T14:32:00.001-07:002013-02-26T14:32:19.697-07:00WeaningThis might be it. I think I am excited about it too. Leland hasn't nursed since maybe Sunday morning. Honestly I can't remember the last time he nursed. We have been only nursing twice a day and only when he asked. The past few weeks there are mornings or evenings he doesn't ask for it, or a full 24 hours without asking but then he would always ask again. <br />
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I didn't want to push him to wean because I wanted it to be on his terms. So this may be it. But I don't want to get too excited about it because he could still ask sometime this week and start up again. I am excited though because it wasn't very comfortable anymore but not enough to make him stop. <br />
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If this is it, that means we made it 22 months of nursing. I am very happy with my decision to nurse this long, it has been really good for Leland and me. I plan to nurse just as long with any other children as long as they are on board. <br />
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I am glad I am not upset about this either. I was pretty sure I would be upset, but I think being pregnant helps me not be upset about him ending our nursing relationship. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09590232957190563888noreply@blogger.com2